![]() We should bring the makers of this show up on charges. Long, lingering shots of her in a bikini, whole scenes where she had to act dramatically while wearing only a bra and Daisy Dukes. Here’s the “cheerleader tryout scene,” which is inexcusably exploitative.įrom there you fall into a dreadful hole of Hewitt obsession, and it’s terrible what this show did to her. It also scares me that the people behind Byrds of Paradise got away with what is, essentially, the ruthless exploitation of a minor. We skeevy guys are legion! In fact, there are so many lovingly preserved clips of underage Hewitt on Youtube, it scares me. Oh, but Dear Internet, you corrected me once again. My worry this week wasn’t that I was the only one who remembered this show but, rather, I was the only one who, 22 years later, was still thinking really hard about 14 year old Jennifer Love Hewitt. Attending the same school are his three children - two I don’t remember because fuck them and 14 year old Jennifer Love Hewitt who mentioned her struggle with her gigantic tits every time anyone interviewed her. They are leaving their colonial dream home with the. ![]() The story follows single dad Timothy Busfield (playing Sam Byrd, thus Byrds of Hawaii, ha ha) who becomes headmaster at a private school. Sam Byrd (Busfield), a philosophy professor at Yale, and his three kids are waiting for the taxi to take them to the airport and their new life. The native Hawaiians were little better than the Hollywood Indians from old westerns, and the feeble attempts to ape Hawaiian dialect were cringeworthy even to people whose main exposure to Hawaii consisted of reruns of Magnum PI (which did actually strive for authenticity every once in a while). ![]() the fish out of water anglos but failed miserably at every single turn. The show was a strangely insulting and idealized look at Hawaii that tried to pull a Northern Exposure with the natives vs. For those of us watching at the time, we were grateful. The show, probably knowing that it was horrible, took every moment to skeeve over her body. The 14 year old Jennifer Love Hewitt, back when she was clean and pure and didn’t look like a refugee from Dachau with big boobs. It only got 12 episodes, and every single moment made you wish you were able to tear your own throat out with your teeth. Short and sweet, Byrds of Paradise weren't around long, but they left a nice mark with Teenage Symphonies.OctoComments Off on Byrds of Paradise Posted in: Cult Cultureįor a little while this week I was worried that I was the only person who remembered the abysmal one-season flop from 1993, Byrds of Paradise. Even if the record's tone is purposely rough, the band's rugged playfulness is clear, front and center at every turn. Hell, "Touch Tunnel" even seems to swipe the vocal melody from the Smiths' "Ask".Ī restrained sort of joy runs through the album too, from the dissonant melodies and male/female vocal smearing in "Paradise, D.C." to the rare hook infiltrating "Broadcast News" and making it a standout (dig its fuzz-blasted Talking Heads sample at the end, too). ![]() Their influences definitely seem to run a similarly wide gamut, with subtle touches of the respective eras of acts like the Modern Lovers and Sonic Youth livening up the record. The LP's got a "retro now" vibe that sits well with contemporaries like Wavves and No Age–at least, the latter's more accessible moments. On Teenage Symphonies, the band drown their tunes in fuzz and set back the distant vocals as far back as possible, creating a purposely scuzzy form of pop in the process. During the band's short stint together, they managed a snotty, lo-fi punk sound that seemed fairly realized out of the gate. Byrds of Paradise started strong with their Omega Man 7" single, and they end strong with their only full-length, Teenage Symphonies.
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